Thursday, December 15, 2011

Getting out is the cure!

So my MIL came in last night after Chris called her to come in early so I wouldnt be alone while he finished up his last two days of 12s. A part of me loved him for it because I knew it would make my life easier, but also I hated it because it meant he had to call and tell her "Steph can't do it alone and needs your help" so much so that you need to fly in tonight, not wait and see if you can drive in the next day. I feel bad for him. He works so much lately and has had to deal with me and all my craziness. All the NEW craziness I mean. before I was a little nutso but it was manageable. But the last few weeks has been over the top crazy. The mood swings, the crying, the frustration, the absolute terror that I have been, all while getting up at 3am every freaking day so he can get off at 430 and come home so I can get a break and still be a bitch to him. This whole time he has kept a smile on his face and put up with my shit. So he is even more my hero than he was before, which I wasn't sure was even possible.

But today was better. The main reason is that I went out. It is so tough to get these girls out, but we did it and the fresh air and sunshine felt amazing. We went to the breast feeding support group which I love because it's just a bunch of mothers all sitting around talking and bitching about this wonderful experience in a way that no man or non mother can relate and even my other mom friends can't truly since they don't have newborns. For them it's more of a distant memory not a current event lol.
After the group we went and got lunch and came home for a nap. So today I got two things that I think are going to be essetial. Naps everyday and some fresh air and sunshine.

Well I am headed to bed and hoping that sleep will come. I need to get back to where I used to be in the beginning where the instant my head hits the pillow I am out for the count. Soon :)

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